It is important to select age-appropriate goals for children who are learning self-control. Try simple goals first, where success is expected one goal at a time. For early elementary school children, appropriate goals might include complying with bedtime rules or showing anger appropriately (instead of hitting or screaming). Some general strategies that often help children learn appropriate self-control behaviors include:

• Take a break: Encourage children to “take a break” or a “time out” from a situation where they are feeling angry or upset.

• Teach and provide attention: Children can learn to resist interrupting others by learning how to observe when others are not talking, so that they can join in appropriately. Be sure to provide children with attention at appropriate times so that they are not “starved” for attention and more likely to interrupt inappropriately.

• Use appropriate rewards: Children need consistent, positive feedback to learn appropriate behavior. Praise and attention are highly rewarding for young children, as is special time with a parent. Be sure your child knows what behavior is desired!

• Use specific activities designed to teach self-regulation: Parents can help teach even young children (ages 5–8 years) the skills that foster self-control, using activities such as those that follow. These skills include dealing with “wanting something I can’t have,” understanding feelings and controlling anger.